Wow, there was a lot of word vomit spewed forth in yesterday's post. Sorry about that. I haven't seen that anxious and paranoid part of myself in a while, but I think I have almost successfully hidden her away. What's done is done and there is nothing I can do about it but be as positive as I can be.
I am now embarking on the 2ww. I've always kinda loved the 2 ww because it is the closest I can feel to being pregnant. Analyzing every symptom, picturing the little beanie that is snuggling into my womb, visualizing the moment when I find that (+) sign. Delusional, I know but I'll take what I can get. However, this wait will be a little different from others because my hubby and I are going to Hawaii next week! I'm sure there will be enough there to occupy my crazy mind, and my hubby and I are both eager to step into paradise for a week. This trip was a bit of a last minute decision and we timed it such that it would fall during this waiting period. So sort of a planned spontaneity. And it didn't hurt that we got an amazing deal on it. I've been so focused on this treatment cycle that I haven't really given myself the chance to digest the prospect of this trip. But now with nothing else to do (besides obsess about hyperstimming in a foreign place and not knowing where to go) I will refocus my energy on planning and packing.
Is it crazy that I just googled the nearest fertility clinic in Hawaii? I don't know... just in case? :)
yeah for vacation and it's in hawaii..even better. Hey I have 1 week to go in the 2ww so I feel ya!
ReplyDeleteWhat a great idea! I love that you are going away during your 2ww. I really need to consider that during one of my 2ww, a little distraction would totally help.
ReplyDeleteLoving the idea of a 2ww vacation too! I enjoy reading your blog and have given you award on my blog for that reason. You can visit my blog to check it out!
ReplyDeletei do all that visualising too!Don't think you're all delusional, I have a couple of books that suggest you do exactly that, apparently we are supposed to visualise our bodies working and ourselves being fertile - hope it works!
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